Monday, February 8, 2010

Finally

Are you breathing? Are you relaxed? Are you doing this with grace?

Well, are you?

For a human being that’s rarely relaxed, this can be a complicated question. A million things are always running through my mind at any given second. I have a writer’s mind, which can sometimes be a big problem in a vocal world. My mind literally thinks the way I write, always creating my own narrations in my mind. I can’t say with this constant dialogue in my mind that I’m actually truly ever relaxed. Until yesterday.

I decided to get in my car and just drive. A chance to process and be still. An opportunity for a new adventure. I listened to my inner guidance. Turn left here. Straight. Now take a right. I found myself in Lodi, Wisconsin where I had spent so much of time almost three years ago now. I turned into the parking lot to the chiropractic clinic, now a massage therapy business to reflect on the conversation that completely changed my life. My “job” was to sell advertising for a small yellow page business. It was a paycheck until I found something else.

In the middle of my misery of transition, I stopped at a restaurant and saw something that changed my life forever. It was a card for a massage therapist pinned to the bulletin board in the entry way. The logo was a dragonfly. I paid attention. Something inside me clicked into a higher vibration. I knew the next step for me was to be a massage therapist. I recognized the clue the Universe gave me. I ended up stopping at a chiropractic clinic that day, and it ended up that the business card was that of the receptionist there. We had a conversation that changed me forever. I thought to myself, “Wouldn’t it be great to work in a chiropractic clinic and be a massage therapist?” A year later I was. I just had to wait for the right people to show up. And they did after they sold their practice in Tennessee and moved to Wisconsin. A bigger plan. Had I missed my clue, I would have been off my path.

Another year later and I attend the Landmark Forum Advanced Course in Chicago. It was profound. I had many breakthroughs in my ways of thinking and I realized that I have been living well below my potential…causing my unhappiness. I’ve discovered if you are off track, unhappiness will follow you. I ended my employment at the chiropractor, in gratitude, for the lessons learned and for the next step in my life. I had no idea what that was to be. I paused. I finished up “The Producers” and let it come to me. I’ve found that if you consistently miss the subtle clues the Universe gives you, that it will keep throwing bigger and bigger ones until you finally pay attention.

The first day of my new job I saw my next clue. Have you ever gotten the feeling that you are destined to know someone? That just by meeting them you are forever changed? That you could just smile in gratitude for the blessed chance of meeting, knowing maybe your time is limited, but still grateful you get the chance to learn. I bless the day I met my new friend, who has quickly progressed into one of my favorite people on this earth. He is the one who asked me, “Am I breathing? Am I relaxed? Am I doing this with grace?” It’s from a book he recently read and it was delivered to me at just the right time. Finally. I had met someone who would further me on my spiritual path and understood beyond superficial consciousness. He showed up. I had almost given up hope.

As I drove, I thought about where I was and where I am now. I thought of all the amazing new people who have entered my life in the past three years, and also the ones that have remained close to me. Thinking of how profound this is gives me hope. It gives me hope that as long as I’m breathing, I’ll be able to pick up the clues the Universe gives me on my journey. As long as I stay relaxed, I’ll be open to what shows up next. As long as I live my life with grace, I’ll create happiness and joy around me. No matter what I’m doing. No matter if it’s where I want to be. If we show up fully, it creates space for others to do the same. I just never saw it that way before.

I thought about my favorite monologue from “How I Met Your Mother.” The words sank in to a deeper level of my being. When you realize all the small things truly do add up to the big moments in life, it takes you to an even more profound way of being and appreciating each day.

“The great moments of your life won't necessarily be the things you do. They'll also be the things that happen to you. Now, I'm not saying you can't take action to affect the outcome of your life. You have to take action. And you will! But never forget, that on any day, you could step out the front door, and your whole life could change forever. You see the Universe has a plan kids; and that plan is always in motion. A butterfly flaps its wings, and it starts to rain. It's a scary thought, but it's also kind of wonderful. All these little parts of the machine constantly working... Making sure that you end up exactly where you're supposed to be.. exactly when you're supposed to be there. The right place. At the right time.”


I still tear up every time I read this because it’s true. Preparing yourself to be the best person you can be along the journey will make you ready for the day when you walk out your front door and your life changes forever.

You have to watch for the clues the Universe throws at you. If you don’t, you’ll find yourself repeating the same patterns, making the same mistakes, until you finally get it. Maybe that consistent minor unhappiness is nothing, just a part of life that we deal with. But maybe, just maybe it’s everything. Taking a step to change something that makes you unhappy to something that will bring you joy, could just be the catalyst for a whole new world. A whole new way of being. It takes courage and it takes integrity. It takes knowing that something bigger than you has got this.

I’m not sure what is next. I’m not sure what this is preparing me for. What I do know is I’m grateful for each and every amazing spirit I meet on my journey. I’m blown away by the mechanics of the Universe. But most of all, I know that when you ask for something to show up, one day, it will. The question is….will you be ready? Are you doing what brings you joy and allowing your inner self to guide you? If you are breathing, if you are relaxed and if you are living life with grace, things will begin to exponentially transform. Be ready for who and what shows up. And accept and learn with grace.

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